Captain Soft Beard
Issue #003 · Now Reading

Captain Spiky Beard: The Beardification

He steals beards. He steals kids. He rules the playground. A flying pirate ship, a beam that turns nine-year-olds into crusty swashbucklers, and three heroes who've read enough to spot a sugar trap.

Pages
14
Villain
Captain Spiky Beard
Rating
Soft · 5+
Read Time
14 min
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Writer The Captain himselfPencils Brainy, PhDColors Dr. FluffingtonLetters FWOOSH Studios
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Pg 01/14
Playground splash. A pirate ship looms above. In the foreground, the twins Heads and Tails. Other kids play in the background. Banner title: THE BEARDENING.
Page 01 / 14 · SplashHeads and Tails — the twins.
The ship lands. It shoots a beam at the twins. Spiky Beard: 'ARRR! You'll do nicely!'
Heads and Tails glow from the beam, transforming into pirates. Heads: 'This is—Arrr?!' Tails: 'Okay this is fun!'
Close-up. Heads (confused): 'I'm a pirate?!' Tails (excited): 'I'm a pirate!'
Random kids in the playground are hit by the beam.
Page 02 / 14 · 4 PanelsThe ship fires. Heads and Tails start to transform.
Aboard the pirate ship deck. Heads, now bearded, among other pirate kids. 'Arrr! We require structure!'
Tails: 'Arrr! If it's not nailed down, it's treasure!'
A random pirate kid with a beard, confused: 'Why do I have a beard?!'
Page 03 / 14 · 3 PanelsArrr! We require structure!
On deck: Heads leaps, Tails maps, Spiky Beard watches his new crew with amusement. 'Magnificent.'
Page 04 / 14 · SplashMagnificent.
Linan, Ronan, and Brainy arrive at the playground. The pirate ship has landed. They stare, astonished. Linan: 'That's a pirate ship.'
Closer: kid pirates on deck. Heads and Tails are among them. Linan in an inset circle: 'Heads. Tails.'
Page 05 / 14 · 2 PanelsThat's a pirate ship.
The Beardifier — the machine on the ship that emits the transformation beam.
In the playground, the Beardifier still beams kids. Half-transformed kids run around shouting pirate stuff.
Brainy and Linan in the foreground, ship in the background still beaming. Brainy: 'The machine is inside the ship.' Linan: 'We can't reach it.'
Page 06 / 14 · 3 PanelsThe machine is inside the ship.
Close-up of heroes at the playground. Brainy: 'We don't push through them. We pull them away. With treasure.' Linan and Ronan look at him, confused.
Page 07 / 14 · SplashWe pull them away. With treasure.
Brainy draws a treasure map at the playground.
Linan drags a treasure chest to the sand area.
Ronan holds jelly beans next to the chest and Linan. Ronan: 'Are we sure this will work?'
Brainy, serious: 'Yes.'
Page 08 / 14 · 4 PanelsTreasure map. Chest. Jelly beans. Yes.
Linan casually drops the treasure map near the ship's ramp.
A random pirate kid finds the map, euphoric: 'ARRR! A MAP!' The crew gathers to look.
Close-up of Heads, ecstatic: 'It be authentic!' Tails: 'TREASURE!'
Page 09 / 14 · 3 PanelsARRR! A MAP! It be authentic!
Pirate kids stream off the ship in chaos. Heads: 'Maintain formation!' Tails: 'No time!'
Page 10 / 14 · SplashMaintain formation! — No time!
Close-up of Brainy: 'Now.'
Empty deck. Linan and Ronan run toward the hatch. Ronan: 'Find the core.'
Inside the ship. The room with the Beardinator. Linan: 'Found it.'
Linan: 'Reverse signal.' Ronan: 'Done.' The Beardinator now emits a greenish light.
Page 11 / 14 · 4 PanelsFind the core. Reverse signal. Done.
Playground. The ship now beams a green light. Pirate-kids turn back to normal. Heads, confused: 'What?!' Tails, shrugging: 'I don't know…'
Page 12 / 14 · SplashWith the signal reversed, kids start getting back to normal.
Spiky Beard alone on the empty ship deck, angry: '…Arrr. Me crew!'
The pirate ship lifts off, leaving the playground. Regular kids play below.
Linan, Ronan, and Brainy at the playground, in victory pose.
Page 13 / 14 · 3 PanelsMe crew!
Playground. A random kid asks: 'Are you guys actually twins?' Heads & Tails, in sync: 'Yes.' Tails: 'Obviously.' THE END.
Page 14 / 14 · SplashYes. Obviously.
Behind the Panels

Issue #003
Field Notes

Heads & Tails
Identical in every metric except measurable good sense. Heads insists he's older by nine minutes; Tails insists minutes are fake.
Beardifier vs. Beardinator
Distinct machines. Beardifier beams forward; Beardinator is the reversed version. The crew refuses to use consistent naming.
Spiky Beard's recruitment policy
Runaway kids from eleven different playgrounds. Uniform code: peg-leg optional, beard mandatory.
End of Issue #003

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